Let’s talk about abortions.
The problem with the whole abortion issue is that it is not
one sided. Everyone thinks that it has to be all or nothing. It is not a black
or white issue. It is very, very gray.
What about a happy medium?
It is a very complex issue.
First of all there is the concept of life. There are many
different views about life. When does life begin? What happens after death? On
one end of the spectrum you have people who believe that life begins at
conception and when you die, your spirit lives on in the afterlife. On the
total opposite end of the spectrum there are people who believe that this earth
life is all there is. There is no God. There is no pre-Earth life and there is
no post-Earth life. Then of course there are people who range everywhere in
between.
So, you have people who believe life begins at conception
arguing with those that don't even believe in an existence of a God (plus
everyone else in between).
Then, there is the argument about taking responsibility for
your actions. If you don’t want to have a baby then don’t engage in activities
that would create one. This argument is one sided because in the 21st century
there are many ways to prevent pregnancy - lots of birth control methods.
However, none of them are 100% effective. Very responsible people have been
responsible with birth control and still got pregnant. For example, when my
husband and I were first married, we wanted to spend the first year just
working on our own relationship and wait to have children. So, I was taking
birth control pills. But then 8 months later, I had food poisoning and
completely forgot that if I couldn’t keep food down, I couldn’t keep the
medicine down either. I ended up getting pregnant. For us, it was no big deal
because we were always planning to start a family, I just got pregnant a few
months before we were planning on trying. But my point is, life happens and
nothing is 100% effective.
There is the argument of the father’s rights. I know that
there are men who have wanted to be fathers or feel like they should have been
part of the decision. But then there are the men who rape women and shouldn’t
have any say at all. Or the idea that there should be some kind of
accountability on the father’s side.
Then there is the argument of how legalizing abortions
actually saved lives because of all of the women who suffered from unhealthy
abortion practices that harmed the woman and even threatened their lives. This
is true. Many women suffered from terrible abortion practices. When I hear the
stories of what some women had to go through, my heart aches for them. But on
the other side of this argument: this is 2022 not the 1960s. Women are not
looked at the same way as they were then. Working women, single women, old
women, young women, it doesn't matter. There is no shame in giving birth (maybe
by individuals but not society as a whole). We also have marvelous medical
advancements! The morning after pill. Multiple forms of contraceptives. Babies
can survive outside of the womb earlier and earlier.
I’ve also heard the argument about maternal mortality rates.
Now, this is alarming. Mortality rates in general are decreasing worldwide.
However, I read on ourworldindata.org that every day 808 women die from
pregnancy related causes. Personally, I don’t believe the solution to that is
abortion. It sounds like the solution to that is better health care. Countries
with good health care practices have lower maternal mortality rates. As a
matter of fact the article on Maternal Mortality on the ourworldindata.org
website discusses how to decrease the world’s maternal mortality rate - and the
thing mentioned is better healthcare practices. Not one mention of abortion.
Then there is the argument that I feel is the most
important. Don't forget about all the women out there who would love to give
birth but aren't able to. The gift of adoption is a great way to turn a bad
situation into a good situation. There are waiting lists for couples waiting to
adopt a baby. Women who are grateful for the selfless sacrifices other women
make in order to make the gift of adoption possible.
In my very humble (and perhaps even not fully informed)
opinion, I believe that before a woman has an abortion, there should be
consideration for alternatives. They need to know all the options for keeping
the baby. They need to know all of the options for giving the baby up for
adoption. They need to know all the different options for abortions and all the
risks of each. Sometimes women don't even know what all of their options are. I
think of the movie Juno. She had decided that she wanted to get an abortion.
But then she learned about other options. After considering all her options,
she decided to bless someone else’s life with her child.
The mother should not only be informed of all of her options
but the possible outcomes of an abortion (which I will now address).
On the other end of the spectrum I also think about the
movie October Baby. I remember when I learned that there are abortion
survivors! Survivors! I learned that there are babies who are born alive after
an abortion and are then neglected until they die.
1 Jill Stanek Testimony Born Alive Abortion Survivors
Protection Act Hearing US Senate Judiciary Committee February 11, 2020 This
article states that there are babies that are aborted alive. What does that even
mean? A baby is born, and they let it die. That is not an abortion. It should
not be called that. They are inducing women to go into labor prematurely and
then letting the babies die.
Some “aborted” babies are miraculously saved and live to
adulthood. As a matter of fact over 365 survivors have connected through this
website: abortionsurvivors.org. You can read their crazy survival stories.
Saline solution abortions that didn’t work and abortion pills that didn’t work.
If there are babies being born after an attempted abortion, it makes me wonder.
What is the abortion survival rate for the fetus? I can’t seem to find that
statistic. I have a feeling that people who perform the abortions don’t want
that information revealed. But that’s my opinion.
There is not a one size fits all answer. My heart goes out
to all of the babies who are aborted and it has only been within the last 10
years that I even knew about abortion SURVIVORS and how sometimes
"aborted" babies are left to cry until they starve to death.
I recently heard that some states are passing a law where
anyone could sue anyone who performs or aids in an abortion. Fortunately a
rapist can not sue someone for performing an abortion - BUT a relative of the
rapist can?!?! What?! A women gets raped and her rapist’s mother can sue the
doctor for performing the abortion? Wow! What is next? People who are against
contraceptives can sue a doctor for implanting an IUD or prescribing birth
control pills? And what about a D&C? What about that? If a woman has a
miscarriage, which quite literally is a natural abortion, and she has a D&C
to remove the dead fetus inside of her, is that considered an abortion? In my
humble opinion? No. But I know women (myself included) who have had D&Cs to
remove a miscarried fetus and THEN I found out that D&Cs are also used in
abortions. So does that mean if you had a D&C you had an abortion? In my
humble opinion, the answer is no, but I have heard of people who don’t make
that distinction.
I believe in the rights of the unborn (and the aborted
alive) but I also support the women who have to make that very tough decision
(and to be perfectly honest I don't have a lot of sympathy for those women who
take having an abortion lightly). There is a post floating around giving a list
of very good reasons for some women needing an abortion. Someone woman was
raped, a child was raped, through IVF a woman has too many viable fetus to
develop safely, failed birth control methods, impregnated by an abusive spouse,
a woman as an ectopic pregnancy, and the list goes on and on.
I am sure I am missing other points on either side. I am
willing to listen and learn.
The bottom line is, it is not a black and white issue. It is
a complex issue. I don't want to be in charge of making anyone else's decision
but I also really don't like the idea of a 36 week fetus being aborted. I hate
the idea of a “born alive” abortion. The important thing is that we don't
insult others because they don't agree with us. The important thing is that we
truly listen to the other person and try to, at the very least, understand
their point of view without the need of insulting them. I know I take the time
to listen and try to understand someone else's point of view, I would like that
same respect in return. Sometimes when I ask a question, it is because I want
to better understand that other person's point of view. Who knows, maybe if we
BOTH listen to each other, one or BOTH of us will alter our own opinions - just
a little or a lot. Who knows? We won't know until we listen and try to
understand each other.
Okay. I am done giving my two cents.
